My Breastfeeding Journey: From Tears to Triumph

I always knew that I wanted to breastfeed my baby, but that didn't mean it was going to be a smooth process. It definitely wasn’t smooth — in fact, it turned out to be a lot more stressful than I had imagined. There were ups and downs filled with tears, pain, and frustration. I’m happy to say that it’s no longer that way and has turned into a wonderful bonding experience with George. I hope that by sharing my story, I can help ease someone else’s worries by showing that we breastfeeding mamas are not alone.

The Early Struggles

At first, George was so sleepy during feeds that he wasn’t latching well — sometimes barely eating at all. Brandon and I were literally tickling his feet and stroking the side of his head just to keep him awake. We also had to top up with formula because the hospital nurses advised it due to a slight case of jaundice.(George is totally fine now and we stopped about a week after getting home.) It was all so overwhelming for me because I wanted to make sure he was getting enough, but I just couldn’t tell. Looking back, I also think my stress didn’t help George either — he could feel it, and that made things harder for both of us.

Then, on top of worrying about his feedings, my milk came in about three days after he was born — and I was definitely not prepared for that. George still wasn’t feeding well, and my breasts became engorged (the thing I dreaded most). It was so painful; they were massive, and I was leaking everywhere. (All I can say is thank God for nursing pads — if it weren’t for those, I’d have permanent wet spots on everything I own!) My bra didn’t fit properly because of how engorged I was, and I felt so overwhelmed by everything — the pain, the concern for George, and the exhaustion. I remember sitting in my room crying as I tried to get him to latch. I wanted so badly to breastfeed him, but things weren’t going the way I thought they would. I hadn’t realized how challenging it could be, and I felt like I was failing.

Finding Support

Brandon felt so helpless because he didn’t know how to support me, so he did what he does best — research. In his search for answers, he found out about a local breastfeeding support group, and it was truly a game changer for me. I was super nervous to go because I didn’t know what to expect, but I’m so glad I went. The group is run by a public health nurse who helps answer any questions you might have. Not only that, but there are other moms there sharing their stories and struggles. It was incredibly reassuring and made me realize I wasn’t alone in feeling the way I did.

I would highly recommend that any new mom look for a support group in their area — it might just be the best thing you do for your own sanity. At the group, we talk about everything, not just breastfeeding, which is amazing. I always leave feeling reassured and comforted, knowing I’m doing the right things for my little man.

Since joining the group, I feel so much more confident in my breastfeeding journey. It’s become such a beautiful bonding time with George, and I’m always in awe that my body can provide for him. I’ve also learned that a lot of moms struggle with breastfeeding. One thing that helped me was realizing that both you and your baby are learning together — it takes time and practice.

In the beginning, I had to do specific things to help him latch properly. For me, that meant using a breastfeeding pillow and positioning my nipple under George’s nose. (Side note: that pillow has also helped a ton with my wrist pain!) Once he opened wide, I’d guide him onto my breast, and we’d finally have a great feeding. Now, I hardly have to do anything — he knows exactly what to do. As the nurse told me, “You could probably hold him upside down and he’d still latch perfectly!”

Wrist Pain and Real Talk

I mentioned wrist pain earlier, and that’s something I really want to highlight. This might not happen to everyone, but it’s something I’ve dealt with and still feel occasionally. The way I used to burp and hold George while feeding put a lot of stress on my wrists and thumbs. I would cradle his head in my hand, with my thumb on one side and my index finger on the other, which caused pain that ran from my thumbs through my wrists and up my forearms. It was rough.

What helped was using the breastfeeding pillow to support his body instead of relying on my hands. When burping him, I started putting him over my shoulder instead of propping him up. These changes helped a lot, and while I still feel some pain from time to time, it’s much more manageable now. I’d suggest using a pillow from the start - and maybe adding a few wrist stretches to your routine to help prevent that pain.

Encouragement for New Mamas

If you’re struggling with breastfeeding in the beginning, keep going — it does get better. I’m so glad I pushed through, because it’s become such a special bonding time for George and me. Of course, I know that if it hadn’t worked out, I would have found other ways to bond with him, but I’m grateful that this did.

That said, if you’re trying and it’s just not working, please remember: fed is best. Don’t let anyone make you feel like breastfeeding is the only right way. As long as your baby is healthy, growing, and meeting milestones, you are doing amazing, mama. Being a mom is hard — give yourself some grace and try not to stress too much. Things will work out the way they’re meant to. 

Thank you for reading about my journey — if you’re a new mama struggling with breastfeeding, please know you’re not alone. 💛 If you found this post helpful, feel free to share your story in the comments or check out my other motherhood posts for more tips and encouragement.